Do Your Relationship Your Way
Today’s post is a little reminder that your relationship is your relationship — that whatever is working for you and your man/woman is good enough and is no one else’s business anyway.
Whether you’re in a relationship funk or are flying high on marital bliss, remember to do your relationship your way, whatever that means for you.
I just finished reading The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. WHEW. I can breathe again. Highly, highly recommend.
The book got me thinking about love and relationships in modern day, to which I now understand there is no one way of how a marriage “should” look, no one ideal that we should strive for in a romantic partnership — because what works for one couple won’t work for another. We should, plain and simple, be following what feels natural to us in the realm of relationships — cutting out the noise we see online and in real life is the challenge.
It sounds like common sense. But I think we have allowed ourselves (intentional or not) to play the comparison game not only as individuals in the pursuit of business ventures and hot bods and personal improvement everything, but with other couples as well — from friends we’ve just met to strangers we see canoodling at the beach.
Hot tip: Things are rarely (never?) as they seem.
My question is…
Have we gotten so caught up in the falsehood of social media (and the film industry and the media at large) that we don’t even know what we want out of a relationship? Because, let’s be frank here, we’ve really only seen one linear portrayal of what constitutes a “successful” relationship, and everyone knows what I mean by that.
The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo prompts important questions on love and relationships at large, like have we been chasing an unattainable ideal of how we think a marriage is supposed to look? Of how a marriage is supposed to feel?
Have we been shown that one “right way” of white woman + white man = white picket fence and happiness forever so many times that we actually believe it? Have we been tormented so many times by magazines and tv shows at how parenting with a partner should be conducted, that we question our own gut instincts?
I feel like a reasonable standard for relationship land is indicative of Charlotte York Goldenblatt’s response to Miranda when asked how often she feels bliss in her marriage with Harry: “Not all day every day, but every day.”
Thank you for reading.
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